(6.67) If one person causes harm out of ignorance
And another gets angry with him, also out of ignorance,
Which person is at fault
And which one is not?
We read all of the teachings on the faults of anger, and how angry people are just so awful, so we tend to think it is justifiable to get angry with angry people, or at least we find it easy to do so. In reality, the person who gets angry and the person who gets angry back are the same – they’re both as bad as one another. No one can be right in getting angry. It is wrong, always wrong, to get angry. In many ways, you can say that we are more wrong for getting angry at people for getting angry, because we know better.
(6.68) Out of ignorance, previously I committed actions
That now result in others causing me harm.
Thus, all the harm I receive is related to my own actions,
So why get angry with others?
(6.69) Seeing this to be the case,
I should practise what is meritorious,
Impelled by the wish that all living beings
Will develop love for one another.
It is important that our Dharma communities and our families show the example in this world of living with one another, being with one another, in harmony – or at least trying to. We need to show the example of accepting and loving one another. Being able to accept one another and to love one another, regardless of differences, regardless of difficulties that we may experience.
Kadam Lucy once said we shouldn’t be too concerned about other’s relationships with us, but rather about their relationships with each other. We work out of the wish that all living beings have love for one another. Very often we criticize one person as a means of getting closer to the other. I did this with my parents, teenagers do it all the time. We need to do the opposite. We need to say only good things about each person to all the others. It starts with us, we need to do this for our Sangha and within our families. We need to show patience, and we need to show love for them. They will then be a bit kinder with those around them, and outward it spreads like the magic crystal (see Eight Steps to Happiness). Within our centers, our families, and our places of work, we create mutually loving communities. Then gradually the much larger community, society, will be influenced by the example of our micro communities. In this way we transform our world into an enlightened society. It is also good to praise the people in our world for being friendly and happy with others. This draws these characteristics out. We need to make people feel like they are a light in other’s lives, then they become such a light.