mindfulness

The Kadam Lamrim of Sutra and Tantra are Essentially All Self-Generation Meditations:

Kadampa Ryan 3. Tantra, 4. Practicing in Daily Life , , , ,

I would say the whole path of Kadam Lamrim of Sutra and Tantra is, from one perspective, a series of self-generation meditations. In Sutra, we self-generate as a “Kadampa” or a fortunate modern Kadampa disciple. In Tantra, in virtually all generation and completion stage meditations, we self-generate as the guru deity with different levels of our mind. With gross generation stage, we self-generate as the deity’s gross body with our gross mind. With the body mandala meditations, we self-generate as the deity’s subtle body which is the nature of our purified channels, drops and winds. With the completion stage meditation of the indestructible wind and mind, we self-generate as the deity’s very subtle body which is the nature of our purified very subtle indestructible wind, in the aspect of the HUM. Even with the meditation on the clear light, we self-generate as the guru-deity’s very subtle mind which is the nature of our purified very subtle mind. These are all self-generation meditations, just at different levels.

All self-generation meditations have the same core elements: what appears, what is felt, what is understood, the mind that holds the object, and the divine pride of being the guru deity on this basis. What appears is the nature of the form aggregate, what is felt is the nature of the aggregate of feeling, what is understood is the nature of the aggregate of discrimination, the mind that holds the object is the nature of aggregate of compositional factors, and the divine pride is the nature of our aggregate of consciousness. When we become a Buddha, these transform into the five completely purified aggregates of a Buddha, otherwise known as the five omniscient wisdoms.

Understanding this, we can see that the progression of Sutra to gross generation stage, to the body mandala, to the completion stage meditations, to the meditation on the clear light are actually all different self-generation meditations with increasingly subtle levels of our mind that function to transform our five contaminated aggregates into the five omniscient wisdoms of a Buddha through the same spiritual technology of changing the basis of imputation of our I to something increasingly subtle and increasingly pure – in other words, through self-generation meditations.

What appears changes at each level. In Sutra, what appears is our samsaric self, in my case Kadampa Ryan. In gross generation stage, what appears is ourself as the gross deity body. In body mandala meditations, what appears is ourself as the deities of the body mandala. In the early completion stage meditations, what appears is ourself as the seed letter, such as the HUM. In the completion stage meditations on the clear light, what appears is ourself as the clear light Dharmakaya.

The next three core elements or parts are the same at each level. What is felt is great bliss, which is the nature of the mind of love. What is understood is not ourself or ourself or the deity we normally see (at each level of mind), but the emptiness of ourself or the deity we normally see. Our self and the deity we normally see do not exist and are mistaken appearances, but the emptiness of ourself or the deity we normally see do exist as manifestations of emptiness appearing in the aspect of whichever level of self-generation we are doing. The mind that holds all this is the perfection of concentration – a perfectly concentrated mind motivated by conventional bodhichitta. The neutral mental factors come together as pure concentration and the virtuous mental factors come together as bodhichitta, the quintessential butter that comes from churning the milk of Dharma.

The specific divine prides we generate vary at each level – I am a Kadampa at the Sutra level, I am Heruka at the gross level, I am the body mandala at the subtle level, I am the completely purified indestructible wind and mind at the very subtle level, I am definitive Heruka at the level of the clear light. But they are all the nature of guru yoga. We don’t just see ourselves as the deity, but as the guru-deity. Here we bring in all of our faith in our guru, not only in the sense of being in his living presence, but of actually being him – the duality between ourself and him dissolves away completely. Our whole mind transforms into the feeling that we are now the guru deity.

In this way, we can easily see how the Lamrim of Sutra and the Lamrim of Tantra are all equally the Lamrim, just practiced at different levels of mind via a self-generation meditation. At the grossest level, we train in Lamrim in the form of the 15 or 21 Lamrim meditations from Mirror of Dharma or the New Meditation Handbook. In Tantra, at the gross self-generation, the body mandala, the completion stage, and the clear light meditations we likewise have the entire Lamrim contained within these five core parts of each self-generation meditation (what is seen, what is felt, what is understood, the mind that holds it, and the divine pride of being the guru deity). Same Lamrim, just at increasingly subtle levels of mind all brought together into a self-generation meditation.

The Dharma we have been given is indescribably profound and elegant. We are beyond fortunate to have found such a path. May I dedicate my life to realizing the Kadam Lamrim at these increasingly subtle levels of mind.

Embracing the Ruins of Our Life

Kadampa Ryan 4. Practicing in Daily Life, 5. Reliance upon Dorje Shugden , , , ,

Sometimes we find our life in ruins. Everything we have been working for and building has been wiped out or lay in ruins, with little hope of ever going back to how things were. Sometimes, even, we realize how our own past choices and mistakes led to such a state. It is easy at such times to fall into extremes of shame, guilt, hopelessness, and despair.

What to do?

Sometimes learning things the hard way leaves a deeper impression on our mind and so protects us from even worse in the future because we once and for all start avoiding repeating those same mistakes. Each time we confront the consequences of our past choices, we can take it as a reminder of these lessons.

But the key, I think, is to make sure we are 100% avoiding guilt and beating ourselves up about it. That just gets in the way, and in fact is its own form of self-anger, so still a delusion and negative action (self-harm).

We need to accept where we are at, both externally in terms of our situation and internally in terms of the nexus of delusions and negative karma that led us to our present circumstances and that still remain within our mind.

To accept where we are at means to be at peace with it. OK, this is where I find myself. I know how I got here and I am at peace with that too, free from any guilt or discouragement. Now, I rebuild from here. We need to accept the rubble of our past wars before we can start cleaning it up and building something new, something better.

When we confront the reality of our situation, such as ruined relationships, those we love falling into the abyss, financial difficulties, health problems, addictions, anxiety, depression, discouragement, bitterness or despair, we need to learn to accept that too.

These outer and inner circumstances give us an opportunity to let go of our attachments to these things. These attachments have led us to countless problems in the past. Our present circumstances give us the chance to finally let them go. This doesn’t mean we abandon, for example, our efforts to have healthy, meaningful relationships nor does it mean we don’t try improve our financial situation if we can, but it does mean we let go of our attachments thinking these things matter for our happiness. They don’t.

Our happiness depends upon whether our mind is at peace with both our external and our internal circumstance. Going forward, it depends on whether we deepen that peace through lamrim, lojong, and mahamudra. This is our task now, if we choose to accept it as the main purpose of what time we have left.

I, of course, realize as I write this that in truth I’m writing to myself. These are exactly the things I need to realize towards my own situation. As somebody close to me often says, “it is what it is.” OK, no problem, we build something new from here – both externally and internally. We try do so on the foundation of the lessons learned seeing the ruins of our present life and that of those we love. We can’t control whether others learn their lessons, but we can learn the lessons from their life for them with a bodhichitta motivation. We collect these realizations now so we can share it with them in the future when they are ready, or at the very least we set a good example they may or may not appreciate.

So yeah, sometimes it is a total wipeout. Sometimes we lose everything. Sometimes even we realize our own role in the situation we find ourself in. Great. We now learn our lessons, let go of any guilt, and get to work on building something new, both externally and internally. Something better, something healthier, something more stable, something more peaceful. The choice is ours. Our future is too. What our future looks like depends upon what we do now. Accept the ruins, yes; lament them, no.

Guru Sumati Buddha Heruka, Dorje Shugden, Heruka, please fill my mind with your blessings to accept the ruins of my life, clean up its mess, learn its lessons, and build something better from here, for my own sake, for the sake of all those I love, and for the sake of all others who might find themselves in similar situations.