Vows, commitments and modern life:  Standing up to the bullies with wisdom

Do not wait in ambush. 

We should not look to take revenge on others waiting for the best time to hurt them.

The mind of anger has one wish:  to inflict harm.  Sometimes we justify this harm on the grounds of “getting back” at the other person, other times we justify it as “deterring them” from inflicting harm on you again because they know you will strike back.  But this is completely wrong.  All we really do is guarantee that one day, when the opportunity presents itself, they will take advantage of our weakness and strike back.

There is another way.  All bullies are the same:  they threaten if you don’t do what I want, then I will do X to you.  Because we don’t want X to happen to us, we go along with what the bully wants.  But this just keeps us forever hostage to their demands.  Instead, we do what is right, and let the pieces fall where they may.  If the other person inflicts some penalty on us for doing what is right, then so be it.  We accept this, but we do not change.  This is actually an act of great compassion.  If we allow others to manipulate us, they create terrible karma for themselves.  If we show that they have no power over us, they will eventually give up trying.  Thus, we protect them from creating such negative karma.

 

One thought on “Vows, commitments and modern life:  Standing up to the bullies with wisdom

  1. Imagine a clear light sky. Mara appears and causes a tornado to blow.
    No light is seen, all is dark, you are in the eye of the storm. Mara, in disguise, shouts at you, looks down on you, criticises you, abuses you, threatens you, intimidates you, throws arrows at you. The energy of the wind consumes you. Mara tries to possess you by his evil.

    Sit. Look to the Earth, perform the earth touching mudra and recall how Buddha defeated Mara, Buddha will rise up.

    Buddha and Mara are battling all the time, inside the mind. Mara is more than just a bully. But as Buddha has shown, even the strongest bully can be defeated.

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