Vows, commitments and modern life: Refuge vows, part 2

Kadampa Ryan Vows, commitments and daily life

Not to harm others. 

This vow means instead to treating others badly we should try, with the best motivation, to benefit them whenever we can.  First we need to practice with respect to those close to us.  We then extend our practice to include all living beings.  It is a very odd thing of modern life that most of us are the nicest to the people we rarely see and barely know, but can be downright nasty with those whom we live with.  I point this out not to imply we should do the opposite, but rather to say a basic minimum should be we treat those we live with with the same basic courtesies we show perfect strangers.  This change alone would bring quite a revolution in our home and work life.

It is rare these days for us to physically harm others, unless it is by accident.  In modern time, our main instrument of harm is our words.  We get angry, frustrated and say all sorts of hurtful things to others.  We quite often put some people down in an effort to get others to like us.  We talk behind people’s backs or laugh when others do the same.  As a general rule, we should “never say anything bad about anyone ever.”  This is an enormously vast practice, especially in the workplace.  At home, we should principally guard against saying mean or spiteful things, or at a minimum not communicate to others that their very presence is frustrating for us. 

At work, we may be in a position of some power or authority where the decisions we make affect others.  More often than not, there is no decision we can make where somebody won’t be harmed.  All samsaric decisions necessarily involve trade-offs, and that means some people will be harmed and others will be helped.  This does not mean as Kadampas we should avoid positions of authority.  Rather, it means when we have to make decisions we should follow some basic principles.  First, we should make sure our decision does more good than it does harm taking all things into consideration.  Second, our decision should be as impartial as possible, not favoring one group over another.  Third, if some people are harmed from our decision but it is nonetheless one where the winners win more than the losers lose, there should be a way to structure some sort of compensation mechanism where the losers are compensated for their loses while still leaving enough for the winners that they are better off.  If we struggle to make difficult decisions, we should request wisdom blessings to make the best possible decision we can.

To regard all Dharma scriptures as the actual Dharma Jewel. 

This vow means since we cannot see actual Dharma Jewels with our eyes (because they are internal realizations) we need to regard Dharma texts as actual Dharma Jewels.  Actual Dharma Jewels arise in dependence upon the meaning of Dharma texts.  We need to respect every letter of the scriptures and explanations.  We need to treat them with great care and avoid walking over them or putting them in places where they might be damaged or misused.

This begins with some very basic things like keeping our Dharma books and sadhanas in a special place separate from all of our other books.  It means not putting them on the floor, etc., and instead to treat them with respect like we are holding something precious.  Over time, this practice can become quite vast.  We can view each word of a Dharma book as the actual speech of a Buddha much in the same way we see beyond the metal of a statue to imagine the living Buddha there.  When we read Dharma books, we should not think of them as inanimate words on a page, but rather as a direct telephone line to the Buddhas.  They literally speak to us through Dharma books.  The way this works is quite magical.  If you have some problem in life or conundrum to resolve, close your Dharma book, close your eyes, and then sincerely make the request, “please reveal to me the answer to this problem.”  Then, randomly open the book to some page, and it is guaranteed that the answer to your problem is on that page.  Geshe-la explained once that he blessed his books in this way where you could do this and get answers.  In particular, Joyful Path of Good Fortune is blessed in this way.  It may not be immediately obvious how what you read is the answer to your question, but that will primarily be because you are still grasping at your outer problem being your problem.  Your problem is your mind.  The answer to your problem is on the page.  Request wisdom blessings to realize how, and as you read the words imagine their meaning is penetrating deep into your mind bestowing upon you the wisdom answer to your problem.

If we are a tantric practitioner, we can train in viewing all sounds we hear as being mounted on mantras.  Even if somebody is yelling at us, internally we can view their screams as being mounted on mantras, and as the words enter our mind the mantra does as well blessing our subtle inner energy winds, healing them with the function of whatever mantra we imagine.  With training, all sounds from honking horns to the rustling of the trees in the wind will be, for us, eloquent explanations of the Dharma – personalized teachings every moment of every day.

Not to allow ourself to be influenced by people who reject Buddha’s teaching. 

This vow does not mean that we should abandon these people, merely that we should not let their views influence our mind.  Without abandoning love and consideration, we need to be vigilant and make sure that we are not being led astray by their bad habits and unsound advice.

Once again, maintaining awareness of the distinction between our outer and inner problem are our ultimate protection.  It is very rare for non-Dharma practitioners to fail to make this distinction, so their advice to us will not be the answer we need.  They may have very sound advice when it comes to how to solve the outer problem, but we should keep the counsel of the three jewels for solving our inner problem. 

It is said that about 80% of communication is non-verbal, 15% is the tone we use and only 5% the meaning of our actual words.  This is really important to keep in mind in the context of this vow.  It means 80% of how others are influencing us comes from simply how they are, what they strive for and how they behave.  We very easily become socialized into the norms and habits of those around us, for good or for ill.  If we find ourselves surrounded by people who routinely are making wrong choices, we need to be extremely vigilant to not simply not follow their advice, but to not become socialized into being just like them.  Social osmosis is probably one of the most powerful forces in the world, and is something that is largely invisible to us.  This does not mean we should avoid these people, rather we should just remain mindful of all the different ways they have the potential to influence us, both verbally and non-verbally.  When somebody verbally gives us bad advice, very often their bad advice itself can be a powerful teaching because hearing it reminds us of why it is wrong and therefore it teaches us what is right.  In the same way, if we remain mindful of our Dharma wisdom, seeing people’s wrong behavior can function for us as a powerful Dharma teaching.  With such mindfulness, we can circulate among anybody, even the most degenerate, and instead of being dragged down we will feel lifted up.

 

Vows, commitments and modern life: Refuge vows, commitments with respect to the Buddha Jewel.

Kadampa Ryan Vows, commitments and daily life

The refuge commitments lay the foundation for all the realizations of the stages of the path.  Realizing this, we should not regard them as a burden, but practice them joyfully and sincerely.  The principal function of our refuge vows is to maintain the continuum of our Buddhist path without interruption between now and our eventual enlightenment.  In other words, by training in the refuge vows we will create the karma necessary to maintain this uninterrupted continuum of our practice all the way.  It is like we enter into a karmic slip stream which carries us to our final destination. 

The second main benefit of keeping our refuge vows is we open our mind to receive the blessings and help from the three jewels.  On our own, we lack the necessary power to complete the path.  We lack not only the necessary horsepower, we lack even the gasoline.  Our effort plants the gasoline of karmic seeds on our mind, and the blessings activate these seeds and give our spiritual journey horsepower.  With them, there is nothing we can’t accomplish.  Without them, there is almost nothing we can accomplish.  Ultimately, we can learn to rely upon the three jewels for all of our actions, from giving teachings at a festival all the way to flossing our teeth.  We can eventually learn how to have our every action of body, speech and mind be the three jewels working through us.  For more on the benefits of the refuge vows, please see Joyful Path of Good Fortune.

Some people mistakenly think we only focus on our refuge vows at the beginning of our practice.  No, our refuge vows remain the foundation of all of our other practices all the way until the very end of the path.  There is never a time when we do not need to maintain this basic foundation.

The refuge vows will now be explained:

Not to go for refuge to teachers who contradict Buddha’s view or to samsaric gods. 

This vow means we should not go for ultimate refuge to anyone who contradicts Buddha’s view.  Ultimate refuge roughly means here “who has the final say.”  Throughout our lives we will be exposed to countless different ideas, each of which will have their own degree of validity.  But we consider the definitive word to be that of Buddha.  There is a good reason for this.  Only Buddha explains the radical view of the Prasangikas, which explains (in fact proves) that everything is a karmic dream.  Only this view is free from all ignorance.  Any view short of this will be contaminated, even if only marginally, with a wrong understanding and therefore will not provide us with the final word on any given subject.  This vow does not mean that we can’t still receive ordinary help for ordinary things from others, such as a lawyer or a dentist. 

Samsaric gods in this context has two meanings.  The first is literal, meaning we don’t turn to beings who themselves are still in samsara for help in getting out.  A drowning person cannot save another drowning person.  Of course we can still turn to beings within samsara for help with things in samsara, but they can’t provide us ultimate refuge for getting out.  The second meaning is metaphoric.  Our true samsaric gods that we are willing to sacrifice everything to are the eight worldly concerns.  In simple terms, this refers to attachment to pleasant feelings, praise, a good reputation, etc.  Everything we generally do in life is aimed at securing these things or freeing ourselves from their opposites.  These are the gods we follow.

We most frequently break this vow by mixing Buddha’s teachings with non-Buddhist ideas.  We can most easily keep this vow by making a clear distinction between our outer problem and our inner problem.  If our car breaks, it is not our problem, it is our car’s problem.  Our problem is the unpleasant feeling in our mind that comes from our delusions.  To fix that problem we turn to the three jewels.  As long as we make this distinction in any given situation, there is little risk of us going in the opposite direction of this vow. 

To regard any image of a Buddha as an actual Buddha. 

This vow means whenever we see a statue of Buddha we should see it as an actual Buddha, regardless of its quality of craftsmanship.  We should make offerings, prostrations and go for refuge to it.  For those with a Christian background, this vow usually raises some serious eyebrows about idolatry.  Of course it would be foolish to pray to a piece of metal.  Metal can’t do anything for us.  That is not the meaning here.  The meaning is we should not believe the ordinary appearance of seeing the metal, but instead we should “see beyond it” and imagine that there is actually a living Buddha there.  This is a correct imagination because Buddhas pervade everywhere and the ultimate nature of all things is a Buddha.  So we don’t view the metal as a Buddha, rather seeing the metal reminds us to see with our wisdom eyes a living Buddha actually sitting there.

It is a good idea to always be in the presence of a Buddha image to serve as a constant reminder.  For myself, I have on my desk at work a 3-fold picture frame that has images of my guru, yidam and protector.  When I work, I occasionally look up from my computer and see them.  At home, I have an image next to my bed, and of course there is my shrine for my daily meditations.  I knew this one woman who quite literally wall papered her entire room with different images of Buddhas!  While this may not quite be “remaining natural while changing our aspiration,” it is frankly not that bad of an idea!

Vows, commitments and modern life: General advice on training in vows and commitments

Kadampa Ryan Vows, commitments and daily life

Most of us know the teachings Geshe-la has given on the correct attitude to have towards our vows and commitments, but sadly we don’t ever seem to really believe him when he explains it.  We still tend to think of them in absolutist, black and white terms, when in reality each vows has many many different levels at which we can keep it.  We think in terms of our ability to “keep” our vows instead of viewing them as trainings we engage in.  When we go to the gym, there are all sorts of different exercise machines.  Each one works out a different muscle, and each person who uses the machine uses it at a different level (different amounts of weight, different number of repetitions, etc.).  But everyone in the gym uses the same equipment.  It is exactly the same with our vows.  Each vow is something we train in, not something we are already expected to be able to do perfectly at the maximum.  Each vow focus on strengthening different mental muscles, but doing all of them strengthens the whole of our mind.  We each train in the vow at different levels according to our capacity, but we know the more we train the more our capacity will grow.  Everyone in the spiritual gym trains with the same vows regardless of our level.  In almost every way, the correct attitude towards a physical exercise regimen is exactly the same attitude we should cultivate towards our spiritual exercise regimen of our vows and commitments.  I often find it helpful to read the sports training literature, especially that of long-distance tri-athletes.  Our journey is very long and will require almost unthinkable stamina, but we must recall every Iron Man Champion was once a baby who couldn’t even lift their head. 

Geshe-la explains there are four main causes of the degeneration of our vows and commitments.  These are known as the ‘four doors of receiving downfalls’.  He says to close these doors we should practice as follows:

  1. Closing the door of not knowing what the downfalls are.  We should learn what the downfalls are by committing them to memory.  We should learn how they are incurred.  We should make plans to avoid such situations.  In this series of posts, I will try explain all of these things for each vow.
  2. Closing the door of lack of respect for Buddha’s instructions.  We can protect ourselves from this primarily by training in the refuge vows.  Refuge is not a difficult concept.  When we have a toothache, what do we do?  We turn to the dentist.  When we have a legal problem, what do we do?  We turn to a lawyer.  When we have an internal problem with our mind, what do we do?  We turn to Buddha, Dharma and Sangha.  Dentists can fix our teeth and lawyers can solve our legal problems, but only the three jewels can help us with our inner mental problems.  Geshe-la said we should contemplate as follows:

“Since Buddha is omniscient, knowing all past, present, and future phenomena simultaneously and directly, and since he has great compassion for all living beings without exception, there is no valid reason for developing disrespect towards his teachings.  It is only due to ignorance that I sometimes disbelieve them.”

  1. Closing the third door of strong delusions. For our Pratimoksha, and Bodhisattva vows, we should principally try to overcome our delusions by practicing Lamrim.  If by practicing Lamrim we are always able to maintain a good intention, there will be no basis for incurring Pratimoksha or Bodhisattva downfalls.  At the end of the day, our Pratimoksha vows come down to one simple concept:  do no harm (to ourself or to others).  Likewise, our bodhisattva vows come down to cone simple concept:  put others first.  If we do these two – do no harm and put others first – then we will be directly or indirectly practicing all of our Pratimoksha and Bodhisattva vows.  For our tantric vows, if by practicing generation stage and completions stage we overcome ordinary appearance and ordinary conceptions, there will be no basis for incurring Tantric downfalls.  Again, to keep things simple, what does this mean:  It means we ask ourselves one simple question, “what would Heruka do?”  Heruka sees everyone and everything as pure, not because they objectively are pure but because maintaining this view functions to draw out the purity in everything until eventually it becomes our living reality.
  2. Closing the fourth door of non-conscientiousness.  We should repeatedly bring to mind the disadvantages of incurring downfalls, and the advantages of pure moral discipline.  These have been explained in the previous post, and the specific karmic benefits of each vow will be explained in the explanation of each vow.

In brief, Geshe-la explains, we prevent our vows from degenerating by practicing the Dharma of renunciation, bodhichitta, correct view, generation stage, and completion stage. 

It is important to be skilful in our approach to the vows.  We should not have unrealistic expectations or make promises we cannot keep.  It will happen to all of us in the early stages of our Dharma practice that when we are at some festival and feeling very inspired, we make these outlandish vows that we (at the time) intend to keep our whole life.  Then we get home, try at first, but eventually are forced to abandon the vow.  Venerable Tharchin says when making promises, we should ask ourselves, “what can I do on my absolute worst day?”  We promise only to do that.  On any given day we will most likely do better than our promise, but then we won’t actually break it.  It is a bad habit to make spiritual promises which we later break.  We will all make all sorts of what I call “beginner’s errors” with this one.  It doesn’t matter.  When you break the promise, realize your mistake, recalibrate your promise and try again.  Eventually you will get the right balance. 

We should adopt the vows gradually, as each can be kept on many levels.  In this way, we can gradually deepen the level we are able to keep the vows.  If we are a teacher, we should explain the vows well and not encourage our students to promise to keep them all perfectly from the start.  Getting the correct attitude towards our vows is well over half the battle.  But keeping the vows gradually does not mean that we can temporarily put to one side the vows that we do not like.  We have to work with all the vows, gradually improving the way we observe them.

Finally, Geshe-la says we should begin to practice all the vows as soon as we have taken them.  Then we practice them to the best of our ability.  Geshe-la says we should never lose the determination to keep the vows perfectly in the future.  He says by keeping the intention to keep them purely in the future we keep our commitments, even if along the way we repeatedly fall short.  I can’t remember who, but some wise person once said, “the day you can keep all of your vows and commitments perfectly is the day you will no longer need them.  It is because you can’t keep your vows and commitments perfectly that we do need them.”  This is useful to always keep in mind.

Vows, commitments and modern life: Motivation for series

Kadampa Ryan Vows, commitments and daily life

Ever since the publication of Modern Buddhism, the central mission of the tradition has been to attain the union of Kadampa Buddhism and Modern Life.  This series of posts will attempt to explain that union from the perspective of keeping our Kadampa vows in the context of our modern lives.

Normally we think of our vows and commitments as an afterthought at best or as chains at worst.  We have all taken our vows many times when we receive empowerments or when we engage in our daily practice, but we still have not started to take our practice of them seriously.  We swing from either the extreme of not even giving our vows a second thought to the extreme of beating ourselves up with them out of guilt for all the different ways we fall short.  We swing from the extreme of over-interpreting the words “do your best” to mean “don’t even bother trying” to the extreme of thinking in absolutist terms about what they mean and imply.  We quite often view them as rules or restrictions imposed from the outside, or we view them as constraints on our having any fun in life.  To us, vows and commitments seem to restrict our freedom, but we grudgingly accept we have to pretend to take them because we want to go to a given empowerment.  But the reality is most of the time we don’t even think about them and we make almost no effort whatsoever to train in them.

This series of posts will attempt to reverse our attitude towards our vows and commitments.  Instead of viewing them as restrictions on our freedom and fun, we can come to view them as an internal GPS guiding our way to the blissful city of enlightenment where the party never stops.  If we wanted to go to a particular city, we program our GPS, hit go and start driving.  We happily follow the directions without feeling like we are being deprived of all the wonders on the side streets we could be exploring.  When we miss a turn, we usually say a curse word, but then the GPS plans a new route and we happily continue on our way.  When we arrive at our destination, we think to ourselves, “man, this thing is great.  How did I ever get around without one.”  It is exactly the same with our vows.  We want to go to the city of enlightenment (our good motivation), the vows and commitments are like the directions the GPS gives us along the way to keep us on our chosen route, and if we follow them happily but persistently, they will definitely deliver us to our final destination.  If we get lost or take a wrong turn, we don’t need to worry, because the GPS gives us new directions which we then follow.  No matter how lost we become, no matter how many wrong turns we make, we always know if we just keep following the directions it gives us, we will eventually get there.  It may take longer than what was originally planned (wrong turns), or there may be unexpected traffic (negative karma we need to purify), but if we just keep at it, we will get there. 

I know some people think their GPS gets upset at them when they make wrong turns.  But this is just our own anger at ourselves projecting our frustration onto the GPS voice.  But nowadays, we can program our GPS with all sorts of different voices to choose one more pleasant.  I actually know somebody whose GPS has the option of choosing the voice of a Porn Star (turn right, baby…)!  In the same way, we need to make an effort of giving our vows and commitments “the right voice” within our mind.  When we remember them or but up against them, we need to have them speak to us with the loving, understanding voice of our Spiritual Guide.  We need to hear him chuckle and say, “don’t worry, be happy, just try.”  The chuckle is important.  The sign that we have proper renunciation is we are able to have a good laugh at ourselves and our delusions.  It’s OK and it’s normal that we make a hash out of it.  When we make mistakes, we learn from them and move on.  We think beating ourselves up with guilt motivates us to do better, but it doesn’t.  Guilt is anger directed against ourselves.  It destroys all joy in our training, and when we lose the joy we lose our effort (effort is taking delight in engaging in our practices).  Without effort, we have nothing.  We might do our practice every day for aeons, but if we don’t enjoy ourselves while trying, we actually have no effort and will therefore experience no results.  If we want, we can give the vows and commitments the seductive voice of Vajrayogini calling us to join her at her place! 

Our conception of freedom is completely wrong.  Freedom is the ability to choose.  But being a slave to every whim of our delusions is not freedom, it is bondage of an eternal order.  True freedom is the ability to choose to pursue what we know is actually good for us.  Our vows and commitments run in exactly opposite of the direction our delusions want to go.  Since we are still fooled by the lies of our delusions, we think if we follow them they will lead us to happiness.  The reality is all delusions share the same final destination – the deepest hell.  They all eventually lead us to the same place, but they trick us by painting an image of an illusory paradise just over the horizon.  Duped again and again, we run towards suffering and away from true freedom. 

There are three main reasons why we should train in the moral discipline of our vows and commitments.  First, doing so creates the karmic causes to maintain the continuum of our Dharma practice without interruption between now and our eventual enlightenment.  Second, doing so strengthens the power of our mindfulness and alertness, which are the two most important mental muscles for strong concentration.  And third, moral discipline is the substantial cause of higher rebirth.  We seek the highest rebirth of all – enlightenment – but getting there is often like climbing many many flights of stairs.  But it is a joyful climb, because the higher we go the more blissful we feel.  And it is certainly better than the alternative of falling down the stairs…

In this series of posts, I will attempt to go through each of the vows and commitments of Kadampa Buddhism.  I will first explain what each vow is, then I will discuss some instances in our modern lives where these vows come into play, and finally I will discuss some strategies for how to keep the vow with a joyful mind.  To go through all 240+ vows will take a long time, possibly even a year.  So this will be the biggest series I have ever done.  My hope is by explaining all of this I might myself finally start training in my vows and commitments with all the spiritual fruit that flows from this.  If others are also able to benefit from these explanations, then it is all the better.

Transforming our life into the Quick Path: Getting our life together

Kadampa Ryan 3. Tantra, 4. Practicing in Daily Life, Transforming our life into the quick path

The brutal truth is we will never be able to help others with the Dharma if it appears that our own lives are out of control.  Communication theorists say that something like 80% of effective communication is non-verbal, about 15% is the tone with which we say things, and only about 5% is the content of what we have to say.  These are stunning statistics.  In a Dharma context, our non-verbal communication of what it means to be a Kadampa is the totality of our life.  If our life is a mess, if we are a mess, then that will speak far louder than any amazing teachings we might be able to give.  But if we have our life together, the power of our example will teach volumes even if we say very few Dharma words.

Sometimes in Dharma circles there is this mistaken notion that it is somehow worldly to put effort into learning good conventional practices of living and managing our lives.  Geshe-la dispelled this one year at a teacher’s meeting when he said when it comes to management and conventional living, we have much to learn from society.  When it comes to the Dharma, we rely upon our Dharma books.  When it comes to worldly affairs, we rely upon all conventional wisdoms.

 

The reality is our life habits very much determine our habits for our practice.  If we train in good habits of life, then we will have good habits for our practice.  Kadam Bjorn once told me that in the German part of Switzerland, the sangha has very functional lives, but a dysfunctional understanding of the Dharma.  He said in contrast, the French part of Switzerland, the sangha had very dysfunctional lives, but they had a very functional understanding of the Dharma.  The goal, of course, is to have a functional both.  Then we can accomplish great things, both externally and internally.  To help us do this, I wanted to share my understanding of some basic life skills for making the fulfilling of our ordinary lives part of our spiritual practice.

 

Get your priorities right:

  1. Do what you have to do before what you want to do.  Learn to want to do what you have to do.
  2. Invest your energy now into creating causes/building a better future.
  3. Learn to be organized, prioritize and focused in all that you do.
  4. Do the difficult thing now so that you are unencumbered later.
  5. Everything is important, but nothing is serious.
  6. Do what you want, but want what is actually good for you.
  7. Never consume for now, always invest for the future.
  8. Your real job is to learn how to live your life and do what you do with the least delusion and the most virtue possible.
  9. We waste time by thinking the following:  I have plenty of time, so I don’t get to it.  Then things come up, so it gets pushed back.  Then, I am running out of time and some things have to get done so I can’t do it.  Finally, I run out of time and it doesn’t get done.  We do this with wasted time, vacation time, our precious human life, etc.
  10. View all activities from the point of view of what opportunity it gives you to practice and how doing it will transform you into the Buddha you need to become.  Because that is exactly what the situation is.

 

Accept responsibility for everything

  1. Assume personal responsibility for everything and for your own experience.  Then, help others do the same.  Do not accept the blame for other people’s experience or reaction.  That disempowers them from being able to effectuate their own solution.
  2. View others as future emanations of yourself, and treat them accordingly.
  3. Think before you commit, but once you have committed to do something, see it through to the end, no matter how hard it is to do so. If you start something, see it through to the end.  If you give up due to obstacles, you will never be able to accomplish anything and you create the karma for massive obstacles to accomplishing things in the future.
  4. Creating the space to make mistakes is part of being perfect.  Making mistakes is not a problem if you learn from them and try to do better next time.
  5. Laugh at the fact that everything goes wrong, this is samsara after all.
  6. Realize that others don’t owe you anything.
  7. Attachment to justice comes from a false belief that samsara should work.  Let go of it.
  8. Your suffering will last for as long as you don’t end it.  So quit blaming others, and get on with it.
  9. You will know others minds to the extent that you have cleaned up your own.  The extent to which you have cleaned up your own mind is the extent to which you will have the clairvoyance of knowing others minds and knowing what is wrong to be able to help them.
  10. The challenges you have are those given to you to forge you into the Buddha you need to become.
  11. The world you experience is the world you pay attention to.
  12. Do not provoke delusions in others, rather draw out the best in them.
  13. Don’t fall into the trap of if you can’t do everything, you do nothing.  Instead, get across the finish line all that you can, but get something across the finish line.

 

Apply skillful effort

  1. Don’t worry about what you are accomplishing, just improve the quality with which you do things.  Results come naturally from that.
  2. Accept where you are at, but do not remain.  There are two things:  where you are at and where you are going.
  3. Appearance-Response.  Respond to whatever appears with the least delusion and the most wisdom/virtue possible.
  4. When you fall, laugh, get back up and try again.
  5. The only way you can fail is if you give up trying.
  6. Reprogram yourself where the harder it is, the more motivated you are to keep going.
  7. There is nothing you can’t do if you practice.
  8. Rejoice in what you do do, don’t judge yourself for what you don’t do.  Do the same with others and help others do the same with themselves.
  9. If you do not have an effect that you want, take that as a sign you need to create its cause.
  10. Be rigorous, but never rigid, in everything you do.
  11. Adapt as necessary when your plan meets reality, but keep innovating until the objective is accomplished.  Adapt, yes; abandon, no.

 

Be on good terms with everyone

  1. Maintain good relationships with everyone in your life.
  2. Like the sun, make everyone around you feel good about themselves.
  3. Help others accomplish what they are trying to do.
  4. Be genuinely happy for others good fortune and successes.
  5. Don’t expect samsaric beings to act in non-deluded ways any more than you expect fire to not burn.

 

Employ skillful means

  1. Say nothing and think nothing bad about anyone.
  2. Learn from everybody’s mistakes
  3. Quietly do your own thing under the radar, without telling others what you are doing.  Anonymous bodhisattva. Do not be quiet because you think they are wrong and that they are not open minded enough to discuss it.  Rather, respect each person’s choice to practice in the way that seems best to them, accepting where they are at and trusting their intention.  Don’t not be quiet about of defensiveness or feeling they need to change others.
  4. Give up trying to change others and just focus on changing yourself.
  5. Personal experience speaks.  Everything else is just words.
  6. Instead of giving people the solution, ask them the right questions to help them find their own solutions.
  7. Become trustworthy and reliable.  Always keep your word.  If you say you are going to do something for others, always follow through.
  8. Under promise and over deliver in all your interactions with others.
  9. Always do the right thing.  The right thing is that which leads to self and others to decrease delusions and increase virtuous minds.  Do not be quiet because fear of people judging you and thinking that you are doing something wrong and you do not want others to judge you about it.

Contradictions: Examining the legal, political and spiritual consistency of the Dalai Lama’s ban of Dorje Shugden practice

Kadampa Ryan 5. Reliance upon Dorje Shugden

Executive Summary

This paper examines the legal, political and spiritual consistency of the Dalai Lama’s ban on Dorje Shugden practice.  The premise is very simple:  the Dalai Lama’s ban is in direct contradiction with everything he is known to stand for, legally, politically and spiritually.  The contradiction within his own thinking is giving rise to completely unnecessary conflict and tensions within the broader Buddhist community and leading to great suffering within his own people.  The solution to all of this lies in the Dalai Lama lifting his ban.  Doing so will heal the divisions within the global Sangha, relieve the suffering of his people, help advance the Tibetan cause and enable the Dalai Lama to be wholly consistent in defense of the values he so effectively espouses on the world stage.  In other words, lifting the ban helps everyone; keeping it harms everyone.  The choice is his.  In particular, this paper outlines what the Dalai Lama has said about Dorje Shugden practice, what the Tibetan Government in Exile and others are doing about what the Dalai Lama has said, examines the accusations made against Dorje Shugden practitioners, and finally explains why what the Dalai Lama has said in defense of this ban is inconsistent with his own ideals.  In particular, nearly half of this paper is an extensive explanation of how this ban violates the very international human rights legal instruments the Dalai Lama has principally relied upon in his case against the Chinese.  The purpose of this paper is simple:  by exposing the contradictions in the Dalai Lama’s position, it is hoped he will lift the ban, his supporters will stop defending it, and the victims of the ban will find strength in knowing the truth is on their side.  It is also hoped that this document will help those in the press following this story to examine this issue objectively and not pre-suppose the Dalai Lama is right about this ban simply due to his well-crafted international reputation.

Click on the link below to read the full article (MS Word version)

Contradictions – Examining the political, legal and spiritual consistency of the Dalai Lama’s ban on Dorje Shugden (2014)

Transforming our life into the Quick Path: Changing our mind with the Dharma

Kadampa Ryan 3. Tantra, 4. Practicing in Daily Life, Transforming our life into the quick path

The final aspect of being a good example of a Kadampa is using the Dharma to change our mind.  At our stage of development, we can say there are two main ways we use the Dharma to change our mind.  The first is we use it to overcome our attachment to the eight worldly concerns, and second we use it to solve our daily problems.  These will now each be explained.

“…of changing our own mind with the Dharma.”

Dharma practice is the process of changing the habits of our mind.  If we are not changing our mind, we are not practicing the Dharma, no matter how much Dharma we may know.  If we are sincerely changing our mind, we are a qualified yogi even if we only know one or two lines of Dharma. 

We need to make a point of overcoming the 8 worldly concerns.  The first two are attachment to pleasant feelings and aversion to unpleasant feelings.  What is pleasant depends on what you pay attention to.  For example, if we pay attention to the taste, broccoli may seem bad; but if we pay attention to how good it is for our health, we will enjoy eating it.  Gen-la Khyenrab says we need to live our life from perspective of our aggregate of discrimination, not our aggregate of feeling.  It doesn’t matter what we are feeling, it only matters how we are choosing to respond to it.  So much of the spiritual life can be summed up with the phrase “it doesn’t matter, quit whining and get on with it”. 

The next two worldly concerns are attachment to praise and aversion to blame.  If we understand emptiness, we can cut this very quickly by recalling that in reality there is nobody there saying anything or thinking anything about us.  There is just the appearance of somebody there saying of thinking something.  What others say is just karmic echo of what you said about others in the past.  If we receive praise, we should direct it all to the guru at our heart and to the purity of the mind of the other person.  If we enjoy praise, then we will suffer from criticism.  We should use praise and blame to help us identify our delusions and faults.  The correct response to somebody criticizing us should be “thank you for helping me see that in myself.  I certainly don’t want to be like that!”  At the end of the day, praise and blame make no difference on our deathbed, so why should we worry about it now?

The next two worldly concerns are attachment to a good reputation and aversion to a bad reputation.  Again, we can recall that there is nobody there thinking anything, there is just the appearance of somebody there thinking something.  In reality, they are just a karmic echo of what we have thought about others in the past.  When it appears others think badly of us, we should recall this and use it to reinforce our determination to think only good things about others now.  In modern times, there is so much suffering that arises from trying to manage what other people think.  If we realize it does not matter, we can let go of so much suffering.  Even from a conventional point of view, what others think depends upon their mind, not ours.  So it is their problem.  What they think is a reflection of their own mind, so it should not affect us.  We can be concerned about it as it relates to the flourishing of Dharma, but we should never be attached to it.

The final two worldly concerns are attachment to gain and aversion to loss.  What is there to gain, what is there to lose?  Nothing.  There is nothing there, there is nothing to gain, there is nothing to lose and there isn’t even an us.  It is a karmic light show, nothing more.  In the end, gain and loss depend on what you are trying to accomplish.  If we are trying to train our mind, then all things equally lead to a gain.  It is only when we want to accomplish goals other than training our mind that things become “good” or “bad.”  Shakespere said in Hamlet, “Things are neither good nor bad, but thinking makes them so.”  This is very true.  For myself, I deal with almost all of my either worldly concerns through reliance on Dorje Shugden.  His job is to arrange what is best for my practice.  So I simply request, “with respect to X, if it is best, please arrange; if not, please sabotage it.”  After this request, I can then know that no matter what happens, it is for the best.  So I can accept it, be happy and get on with training my mind in the situation.

The second way we can change our mind with the Dharma is we can use it to overcome our problems.  Geshe-la gives the example of our car breaking down.  Normally, we say, “I have a problem, my car broke down.”  But the car breaking down is the car’s problem, not ours.  Our problem is the unpleasant feeling which arises in our mind as a result.  If we want to fix the car’s problem, we take it to the mechanic.  If we want to fix our problem, we need to change our mind by learning how to respond differently to the situation.  Gen-la Dekyong took this example one step further by saying when we think about it the car can’t have a problem either because it is an inanimate object, and how can an inanimate object have a problem.  So in reality, there is neither an inner problem nor an outer problem!

We can say there is an evolution of how to resolve problems.  Ordinary being exclusively try make changes on side of object.  When we have some Dharma wisdom, we pursue a mixed strategy where we change things on the side of object to the extent that we can, and then we change the rest on the side of our mind.  Geshe-la gives the example of having a headache.  We take the aspirin, but then we patiently accept the suffering as purification until the aspirin kicks in.   Through training in this way, gradually our capacity to transform suffering into purification increases and we are able to accept more and more suffering without it being a problem for us.  Where in the past, we may have taken the aspirin at the first available opportunity, we later don’t want to take it because for us we would rather have the opportunity to purify than to have the headache go away.  Eventually, we reach the point where we can change everything with the power of our mind alone.  We spontaneously perceive every object as perfect on side of object because our mind spontaneously responds perfectly to whatever arises.  A pure mind experiences a pure world. 

Transforming our life into the Quick Path: Being a good secret example

Kadampa Ryan 3. Tantra, 4. Practicing in Daily Life, Transforming our life into the quick path

In the last two posts we have been discussing how to set a good example.  First we looked at the need to rely on the Spiritual Guide for all of our actions and why we need to completely respect others’ freedom.  Then, we examined what it means to be a good outer and inner example.  In this post we will explore what it means to be a good secret example.

“secret example…”

The secret example of a Kadampa is a Tantric yogi.  There are several different ways we can do this.  First, in Essence of Vajrayana Geshe-la explains that when others interact with a qualified tantric practitioner it is the same as if they are interacting with the living deity.  Why is this when we are not actually a deity yet?  The reason is wherever you imagine a Buddha, a Buddha actually goes, so when we recall that Heruka’s mandala abides within our body, when others interact with us, they are also interacting with the living Heruka, even if they don’t see him. 

Second, mentally we should send emanations of Buddhas to the hearts of all living beings, and indeed generate them as emanations.  This is an incredibly powerful way of helping others.  By sending an emanation to their heart, an emanation actually goes there and blesses their mind.  By generating them as the deity, it functions to ripen their pure potential.  For ourselves, generating others as deities plants very special karma on our mind which will ripen in the future in the form of us being actually able to see the emanations of Buddhas who are around us helping us. 

Third, we can imagine that both ourselves and others are actually abiding in the pure land.  While what appears may seem like samsara, we should see everything as the charnel grounds of the pure land.  In the charnel grounds, what appears is horrific and awful, but we understand all of these appearances to be by nature Guru Heruka (or Vajrayogini) teaching us the stages of the path.  Or, if we prefer, we can mentally generate a beautiful pure land or the celestial mansion, and we can imagine that when anybody comes in our proximity, they are actually entering Heruka’s celestial mansion.  Heruka’s mansion is a very special place.  Within it, all of the sounds teach the Dharma and the mandala deities heal the subtle body like spiritual doctors. 

Fourth, we can imagine that everything ourself or others consume is actually nectar or offering goddesses.  This nectar functions to heal all physical sickness, heal their minds of all delusions, infuse their mind with inexhaustible merit and bestow upon them the immortality that comes from realizing directly the clear light mind.  So when we see somebody drinking water, eating spaghetti or listening to music, mentally we imagine they are consuming this medicinal nectar which helps them in these ways.

Another very powerful way we can set a good secret example is to imagine that the entire universe is actually contained within our indestructible drop.  We imagine we are on retreat inside our indestructible drop, and everything that arises is taking place within it.  Every appearance is like a ripple on the ocean of our very subtle mind, emanated by our guru protector to guide us along on our retreat.  Such a recognition may sound outlandish, but that is only because our experience of emptiness is not sufficiently deep.  Geshe-la tells the story of how a particular guru went into the horn of a dead yak, without the horn getting any bigger or the guru getting any smaller.  If this is possible with a yak horn, then surely it is possible with the indestructible drop. 

As a tantric practitioner, we can easily transform all experiences into the quick path.  If we experience unpleasant feelings, we practice patient acceptance.  If we practice patience, we accept everything.  What enables us to accept everything is we see how we can use everything for our spiritual training.  Even though we may experience unpleasant feelings, we won’t experience them as suffering and they won’t be a problem for us.  If our practice of patience is well developed, it can be exactly as if we are already in the pure land.  In the pure land there is no manifest suffering and everything functions for us as a teaching.  The mind of patience acceptance is exactly this.  We experience no manifest suffering because nothing is a problem for us because we can use it all.   Likewise, everything functions for us as a teaching.  It becomes as if instead of our suffering pushing us deeper into samsara, our unpleasant feelings actually push us out!  We can literally reprogram our reaction to suffering where for us it functions as an empowerment.  When we experience pleasant feelings, we can offer them our guru at our heart and use it as an opportunity to train in bliss and emptiness.  Either way, it fuels us along the path.

 

Transforming our life into the Quick Path: Being a good outer and inner example

Kadampa Ryan 3. Tantra, 4. Practicing in Daily Life, Transforming our life into the quick path

We continue with the discussion of how to be good example.  There are three types of example we set, an outer example, an inner example and a secret example.  In this post I will explain how to set a good outer and inner example.

“be the best outer [example]…” 

First it is important to clarify a few things about being an example.  We should ‘be’ a good example, not ‘show’ one.  If we are a good example, we will naturally show such a good example.  If we try show one but are not such an example, it will come across as false and not work.  We should be the best example we can possibly be.  This means watching our behavior as best we can, imagining that we are in the presence of Geshe-la and all the Buddhas.  Part of this means being at peace with and accepting our mistakes.  Part of being perfect is creating the space to make mistakes and learn from them.

The outer example of a Kadampa is the Pratimoksha.  For our purposes, it has three elements.  First, we should harm no one.  We need to eliminate any trace of harming others with our body, speech or mind.  Second, we should help everyone.  We need to find out what others are trying to accomplish and help them do it.  And third, we need to get our life in order.  In a later post, I will explain some basic suggestions on life skills and why this is important.

I wanted to say a few words about the difference between a lay and an ordained outer example.  Within the tradition, we need a wide spectrum of examples to capture the wide spectrum of lives people have.  There is enough room for everybody as their own example within the lineage.  There are many wrong views about being lay or being ordained.   Some stay in lay life out of attachment to samsara.  Some become ordained out of aversion to engaging in certain activities or living a certain way of life, grasping at such ways of living as being inherently deluded and samsaric.  Both of these are a lack of creativity with regards to how to transform any activity into the quick path.  Each activity gives us a chance to work on certain delusions.  The training is to be able to do this activity without delusions and to engage in it with supreme virtue.  There are many layers of delusions and many layers of making any activity more virtuous.  Lay or ordained are just different personal choices of mode of practice.  What matters is that we commit our lives to the best of our ability to overcoming delusion and training in virtues for both ourselves and for others.   Gen-la Khyenrab says there is ‘one path’, whether we are lay or ordained.  The real question is our individual karma what is most beneficial for others.

“Inner example…”

The inner example of a Kadampa is a Bodhisattva.  There are three aspects to this.  First, we try gain the realizations necessary to lead others to enlightenment.  While we are still under the influence of delusions ourselves, we are limited in how much we can help others.  So we eliminate everything within us that prevents us from helping others.  Others suffer due to their delusions.  Dharma realizations oppose delusions.  We can only help others gain Dharma realizations if we ourselves have them.  So we need to focus on gaining our own realizations of solving our problems with the Dharma, then we skillfully share our experience with others.

Second, we need to live our life from the point of view of exchanging self with others.  This powerful mind gives us the wisdom which knows what is in fact good for our self and for others.  We should live our life from the perspective of exchanging self with others and view everyone as an aspect of our own mind.  We view all others as our self, and then we cherish this new ‘self’ as much as we can or want.  We see each being as an aspect or part of our mind, and we naturally feel the need to lead every aspect of our mind to enlightenment.  We can also view our self as “all others.”  In other words, we believe that everything that takes place within our own mind is a synthetic reflection of what is taking place in the minds of all others.  In summary, we say all others are my self so I need to cherish ‘myself’ as much as I can; and we say I am all others, so by working to completely purify my own mind I am in fact, like a supreme spiritual doctor, working on their mind so that they can be free (we become a Buddha for their direct benefit).  If we combine exchanging self with others with rejoicing in other’s happiness, then we can literally enjoy ourself not only all the love we give, but all of the happiness of all beings in the world!  If we truly want to love ourself, this is the way to do it!

Third, we need to become everyone’s closest and most reliable friend and confident.  We need to become the person others turn to when they are in trouble and need help.  The closer the relationships we forge with others, the deeper the levels of delusion within our own mind we work on.  I have found the best strategy for becoming this special friend for others is the following:  First, we find out what people are trying to do, and then we help them to do it.  We need to leave others completely free to make their own choices without even the most subtle form of control or manipulation.  This is particularly true in Dharma centers.  It is far too common for over-enthusiastic officers of Dharma centers, convinced by the higher moral calling of their purpose, wind up using the Dharma to manipulate others into accomplish their personal wishes and vision for the center.  Then, when others don’t dutifully comply, tensions and conflict inevitably ensue.  Instead, the officers of a Kadampa centers should ask themselves what are the pure spiritual wishes and projects that the members of the center already have, and then they dedicate themselves to helping those members accomplish their visions.  The officers are there to serve the community, not the other way around. 

In all circumstances, whether we are in a center or at our work or home, we need to have no personal need whatsoever that others make certain choices or do certain things.  No matter what others do, from our perspective, it will be equally good for our practice.  When we see somebody in need, we should never force our help on them.  Instead, we just offer it and leave it to them to decide if want to take it.  Generating the intention to help others naturally creates opportunities to do so. 

The best way of helping others is to relate to their good qualities.  Relating to their good qualities is a means of drawing them out.  This is not difficult to do.  It is merely a question of not having inappropriate attention with regards to others faults and instead to practice appropriate attention to their good qualities.  If we are to help others, we need to have something useful to offer them.  The most useful thing we can offer to others is our own experience of solving your problems by changing your mind through practicing Dharma.  But if we can’t provide such help to others, we should not hesitate to help others in any other way possible, even if on the surface it seems we are providing worldly help to them.  We may be providing worldly help, but we are dedicating the merit we create to later be able to help them with spiritual matters.  And by helping them in worldly ways, we draw ourselves closer to them and later this close relationship will be the conduit through which we can help them follow the spiritual path. 

 

Transforming our life into the Quick Path: Reliance and respecting other’s freedom

Kadampa Ryan 3. Tantra, 4. Practicing in Daily Life, Transforming our life into the quick path

 

We can summarize what it means to be a good example with the following phrase:  “While relying exclusively upon the spiritual guide as the source of all our actions and respecting completely everyone’s freedom to make their own choices, be the best outer, inner and secret example you can be of changing your own mind with the Dharma.”  Over the next four posts, I will expand upon the meaning of this phrase.

“While relying exclusively upon the spiritual guide as the source of all our actions…”

We can say we have two sources of our actions within us.  First is our ignorance and self-cherishing.  This is the current source from which all our actions arise.  The second is our wisdom.  This is actually our true self, which is none other than the Spiritual Guide within us.  Our job is to train in making the spiritual guide the source of all our actions.  By doing so, all our actions will be those of a Buddha, and our life will become the quick path.  Relying exclusively upon the guru is actually quite simple, it is merely a question of which mind we make requests to and it is a question of which mind we choose to listen to and follow.  For more information on this see the series of posts on Activating the Inner Spiritual Guide and relying upon the Guru’s mind alone, which you can find in the category section. 

But briefly, what is the actual method for having the guru be the source of all our actions? Geshe-la gave some special advice on this to the ITTP several years ago.  First, we need to make completely still your ordinary self to get out of the way.  Then, we generate a pure spiritual motivation to help those around us.  The scope of our motivation determines the scope of the actions that arise.  We should recall that our guru (definitive Vajradhara) is none other than our own true self, the foundation of our being.  Then, with deep faith, we request him to reveal to us what we should do.  Then, we surrender ourself fully to him so that he may work through us and he can use us as one of his limbs.  If we can master this, we can effectively accomplish all actions through invoking the Buddhas with a pure intention.  This enables us to engage in a Buddhas actions right now.

In particular, we can have all our actions be those of a Buddha from right now by learning how to invoke the Buddhas, in particular, the guru, yidam and protector, to accomplish their function.  There is little difference between being able to do things ourself and being able to ask somebody else to do something.  From the point of view of effect created in the world, it is the same.  Through the above method we can request the three principal deities to accomplish their function for ourself or for others, we invoke them to accomplish their function.  Clearly they will only do this if our motivation is correct, we have deep faith, and we understand how they are not separate from us.

The three principal deities and their function can be understood as follows:  The Guru guides us as to what to do and how to help others.  The Yidam, or personal deity, is the source of all our actions and who we ultimately strive to be.  The Yidam has the power to bestow blessings on others.  The Protector arranges everything so that whatever circumstances arise, it functions to forge us as quickly as possible into the Buddha we need to become.  We can accomplish all the four types of actions (pacifying, increasing, controlling and wrathful) through relying upon him.

We need to spend time building links with these three deities to increase our access to their power and function.  The most important thing is to build faith in them that they are there and ready to respond and help.  During the meditation session, we should feel as if we retreat into the pure land in our heart and we mix fully with them to gather their strength and wisdom.  Then, during the meditation break, we use them to accomplish all your actions in the way described above.

“and respecting completely everyone’s freedom to make their own choices…” 

We need to respect completely everyone’s freedom to make their own choices.  For Dharma to work it has to come from one’s own side, and one’s own desires.  When we do not respect the freedom of others, it invites rebellion and resistance.  Since we only want what is good for others, to not respect them sends them in the exact opposite direction.  We need to leave everyone free to contribute in their own way that they see best.  We should not have pre-conceived notions of what they should do.  We give to others the principles and let them decide themselves how to best contribute.  In particular, we need to do this without any trace of judgment.  If we judge others, they become defensive and self-justify, so we just create the conditions for them to hold on even more tightly to their wrong views.  In contrast, by accepting others fully, we create the space for them to change from their own side.

We need to be skillful.  We should not try to change others to adopt our view because when we do so it comes across as being patronizing, prideful and manipulative.  Instead, in our own actions, we should respect other people’s choices and make our own actions correct.  Other people do not have to understand what we are doing or thinking, but we do and we have to know with an honest mind whether what we are doing is right or just an excuse for remaining ordinary and deluded.  We have a tendency to project others are judging us and then we feel the need to defend against it.  When we do so, we wind up creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.  We project others are judging us out of our own insecurity and doubt about whether we are doing something wrong.  If we clarify this internally, the people appearing to judge us will simply dis-appear.

We will inevitably encounter situations where there is a difference of view with someone.  Our goal during such discussions should be to avoid constructing things where one person is right and the other is wrong, rather we should strive for a situation where both people are equally right, just in different ways and from different perspectives.  We can simply explain why our way of viewing things works for us, without trying to impose our view on others or convince others that our view is superior.  If others find our view to be interesting and valid, then they can adopt it from their own side.  From our side, we simply clarify how we think and understand things.  In general, unless the circumstances call for it, we should not enter into debates with others.  Above all, when we are giving advice to others, we should never accuse them of having a particular delusion.  Instead, we should tell stories about ourselves in similar circumstances and explain how our own mind works in deluded ways, or we can tell stories of people we know in similar circumstances and we can use their story to illustrate how things work.  But we leave others to make the final step of connecting the story to their own lives and situation. 

It is a misuse of Dharma to try to change others with it when we have attachment to them changing.  All of Dharma is and should be viewed as personal advice.  We often feel others are judging us unfairly, so we want to change their views out of an attachment to getting them to stop.  We feel justified in doing so because ‘we are right’.  But because our motivation is attachment/aversion, when we do go out to ‘change others’, others will merely see us acting out of defensiveness and self-justification.  They will then train themselves in rejecting what we have to say, even if what we have to say is correct.