(5.56) I should not become disheartened by the behavior of others –
The childish, who are in disharmony with one another –
But understand how this behaviour arises through the force of delusions
And be compassionate towards them.

The bottom line is most of us simply don’t like being around deluded people.  Their constant negative attitude, wrong views, faulty actions and complete ignorance that they are doing anything wrong just grates at us.  It’s simply no fun to be around them, and we naturally try to avoid them.  It is a fundamental contradiction to claim to be an aspiring bodhisattva yet hold on to an aversion to being around deluded people.  What is a bodhisattva promising to do other than spend the rest of eternity helping deluded people?

The behavior of others should never disturb us. No matter what they may be saying or doing, if their behavior does disturb our mind then there’s something wrong in our mind.  We like to blame others for what happens in our mind, but ultimately we are entirely responsible.  The extent to which others can influence what happens in our mind is the extent to which our mind is under the influence of delusions.

Regardless of their behavior we must be utterly accepting of them, just as our spiritual guide is utterly accepting of us.  Normally, we expect everyone else to behave almost perfectly.  When they don’t, we find fault in them.  We say, “the ‘normal’ reaction would be for the other person to do XYZ.”  We usually feel entirely justified in our expectations regarding others’ behavior.  But thinking “you shouldn’t behave like that” is an unfair and unrealistic expectation of a human being.  What is in fact ‘normal’ is for people to act in deluded, counter-productive, inconsiderate, selfish ways.  Why should we expect anything differently?  It is the very nature of contaminated aggregates to behave like that, just as it is the very nature of fire to burn.  It is not their fault — it’s the fault of delusion. To judge them for not behaving according to our expectations leaves us constantly frustrated and the other person resentful.  The appropriate reaction on our part to the deluded behavior of others is compassion.  Because they are under the influence of delusion, everything they do is self-defeating.

We have to be aware of the unaccepting thoughts arising in our mind.  We have to be careful of such thoughts because they manifest themselves in our words and expressions, and others can easily feel like they’re being told off or judged.  What we say and do can easily upset others.  People sense our disapproval; they know if there’s judgement taking place.  They become unhappy, discouraged, develop negative minds. They feel, “in this person’s eyes I can never do anything right.”  This is especially a problem if people look to us, like our children or students or friends who we help, etc.

Sometimes we think we help people by ‘telling them what they need to hear.’  But we need to check our own mind.  If our heart is genuinely full of compassion, then perhaps sometimes it is appropriate to do so.  But if our motivation is more frustration where we need the other person to change, then this is just anger.  If we accept others as they are, we don’t need them to change at all.  For us, they are perfect just the way they are, delusions and all.  When this is genuine, then we are in a position to actually help people and they will know that what we are saying we are saying for their own benefit.  Otherwise, they just see our frustration and will resist everything we say.

We need to follow the example of Geshe-la.  If we think how many times Geshe-la has told us off and how much he encourages us.  We know a lot of our behavior is wrong.  But still he’s encouraging.  The people who look to us need to sense that from us too.

When we accept others as they are, it creates a space for them to change from their own side.  When they feel judged, then they close up and defend themselves instead of try get better.  If people feel judged, unhappy or discouraged by us, this is a sign of unskillful behavior.   If we want to help people, we need to completely remove from our mind all forms of disapproval.  When they know we are not judging them, they will come to us with their problems and then we can help them.  If they feel judged by us, they will come to us with nothing, and we will be powerless to help them.  Seeing that they are not coming to us, we will feel the need to force our way in.  When we do this, they will internally reject what we have to say.  This will make the situation worse.

(5.54) Thus, having checked thoroughly for delusions
And minds that are drawn to meaningless things,
Courageous practitioners should hold their mind steady
Through applying the appropriate opponents.

(5.55) With complete certainty, strong faith,
Steadfastness, respect, politeness,
Sense of shame, fearfulness, and inner peace,
I should strive to bring joy to others.

Here, Shantideva outlines the main causes and conditions necessary for our practices of guarding the mind and moral discipline.

First, we need constant mindfulness of what we are doing with all of our bodily, verbal and mental actions.  If we are not aware of what we are doing nor seek to improve it, we will never change, but continue to be blown by the winds of our delusion and negative karma.  If instead we remain mindful of our behavior, we will become aware of our mistakes and learn how we can do even better.  In this way, we gradually improve and overcome all our faults.

Second, we need complete certainty about the objects to be abandoned and the objects to be attained.  For as long as we grasp at our outer problem as being our problem, we will remain confused about what is to be abandoned and what is to be attained.  We will waste all of our energy seeking to change our external circumstance and invest little in changing our own mind.  For me, the most important distinction on the spiritual path is between our outer problem and our inner problem.  If we are clear about the difference between the two, we will naturally seek two types of solutions:  outer solutions for solving our outer problems and inner solutions for our inner problems.  Happiness depends on peace of mind, delusions destroy our peace of mind, virtue is enhances our peace of mind, our mind goes on into countless future lives.  When we are clear on these fundamentals, the objects to be abandon and the objects to be attained become self-evident.  We have certainty in our practice.

Third, we need strong faith.  Venerable Tharchin explains that the key to effort is realizing the methods actually work.  When we see our spiritual goals are doable because the methods we have are reliable, then effort becomes “effortless.”  When, however, we believe our spiritual goals are unattainable and we have no idea how to accomplish any of them, effort will be almost impossible.  As Buddhists, we generate faith in Buddha Shakyamuni as somebody who has actually completed the path himself.  Because he has “been there, done that” we know he knows what he is talking about.  To generate faith in the Dharma, we are encouraged to test the instructions out for ourselves.  We are encouraged to be inner scientists who verify the truth of Dharma for ourselves.  Everyone who has put his instructions into practice has confirmed for themselves their efficacy.  To generate faith in Sangha, we learn from their example, both their successes and their mistakes.  With faith, we will know we are on the right track and that if we put the instructions into practice, we will enjoy all of the results indicated by the instructions.

Fourth, we need steadfastness, the mind that is undeterred by spiritual adversity.  We have a vajra-like mind that is prepared to do “whatever it takes” to accomplish our spiritual goals, no matter how hard it might be and no matter how long it might take.  Because we have methods that work, if we never give up, our eventual enlightenment is guaranteed.

Fifth, we need respect.  When we have respect for somebody, we look up to them and we naturally seek to fulfill their wishes.  If we respect our spiritual teachers, we will admire their many good qualities and wish to emulate them; and we will naturally wish to fulfill their wish for us to make progress along the spiritual path.  If we respect living beings, we will admire their good qualities and rejoice in their virtues, and we will naturally cherish others and put their interests first.

Sixth, we need politeness.  If we do not act in ways that are consistent with societal norms and expectations, then people will view us strange and have no wish to enter the spiritual paths we follow.  Without politeness, people will find us abrasive and naturally reject our advice, even when it is exactly what they need.

Seventh, we need a sense of shame and fearfulness.  A sense of shame is not guilt.  Guilt is anger towards ourselves and a non-acceptance of the fact that we are not perfect.  A sense of shame seeks to avoid faults for reasons concerning ourself, such as wishing to live up to certain ideals or even simple fear of taking lower rebirth if we do not.  Fear is not a delusion if the object of our fear is valid.  We should fear delusion, negativity, lower rebirth, rebirth in samsara and all those we love taking rebirth in samsara.  These fears protect us from making mistakes and the provide constant encouragement to do the right things.

Finally, we need inner peace.  If our mind is unpeaceful, it is necessarily uncontrolled.  If it is uncontrolled, we will have no ability to bring our behavior under control and our actions will remain faulty.  The more peaceful our mind is the more control we will have over our behavior.

And what should we do with these eight inner causes and conditions?  We should dedicate ourselves to bringing joy to the world.  Normally people bring only problems, but as bodhisattvas we strive to bring joy and meaning to others.  Our path is called the Joyful Path not just because it is such a delight to travel it, but also because it is the purpose of our path, namely bringing joy to others.

(5.48) Whenever there arises in my mind
The desire to become attached or angry,
I should not do or say anything
But remain as impassive as wood.

(5.49) Whenever I am pretentious, mocking,
Arrogant, or self-important;
Whenever I develop the intention to speak of others’ faults,
Or think of profiteering or deceiving;

(5.50) Or whenever I start to solicit praise,
Deprecate others,
Or use harmful or divisive speech,
I should remain as impassive as wood.

(5.51) Whenever I desire wealth, honour, or fame,
Or the attentions of a circle of admirers;
Or whenever my mind wishes for veneration,
I should remain as impassive as wood.

(5.52) If I develop a mind wishing to say something,
While neglecting others’ welfare
And pursuing only my own,
I should remain as impassive as wood.

(5.53) If I am ever impatient with suffering, or lazy and fearful of virtue;
If I am about to speak recklessly or disparagingly;
Or if attachment to my circle of acquaintances arises,
I should remain as impassive as wood.

Looks like Shantideva has been watching us closely.  He knows how we act.

He provides lots of examples here of the importance of being as impassive as wood when a delusion is about to arise.  If we can’t stop ourselves from acting on our delusions, we must as Shantideva advises switch off and become like a block of wood.  Our mothers always told us if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.  Shantideva goes one step further saying if you don’t have anything non-deluded to do, don’t do anything at all.

We need to stop paying any attention to what we feel is causing the delusion to arise. We just forget everything.  Stop thinking.  There will be a strong desire to continue and it will be difficult to just stop.

By doing this, in effect we are taking away the power of the delusion by stopping gross discrimination and feeling.  Without these we cannot apprehend or experience anything, and the delusion will disappear.   If we are to achieve success we must train in bringing about and meditating on the cessation of gross discrimination and feeling.  We need to become familiar with that cessation in our mind.

Geshe-la explained this when he did the teachings on Vajrayana Mahamudra.  It is not the suppression of all gross mental activity, rather it is the cessation of it.  We just let it all go and keep our gross mind unmoving. We achieve a cessation of gross mental activity and gross feelings by letting go of all of it.   When we let it go, we have to have a reason.  Otherwise we will just suppress with this method.  We realize that it is our ordinary mind spinning and it will take us where we don’t want to go, so we don’t follow it.  This is perceived by our subtle mental consciousness.  We observe with our subtle mental consciousness the absence of gross mental activity or feeling.  When we do this, all gross delusions subside.

If we become familiar with this practice we can learn to switch off more and more quickly.  If we’re utterly familiar, we can switch off right there and then in the face of delusion.   Just through this we gain some ability to control our delusions, or at the very least stop acting on them.  In Meaningful to Behold Geshe-la says, “by depriving them from energy in this way, we shall prevent our delusions from influencing our behavior, and they shall fade away.”

With a correct motivation, understanding the benefits of this practice, we try to take this advice of Shantideva to heart, especially with overcoming our desire, uncontrolled desire.  When we have desire we don’t want to stop, we want to indulge.  Sometimes it’s best to use this method.  When it becomes too much, we need to just switch off.  It is not a holding down of gross thoughts it is a letting go of all of them.  We pay attention to something different – the stillness of our mind.  This will give us some space.  With the space we acquire, we then need to debunk the delusion – realize that it is a lie.  If we still believe the delusion but don’t express it, we are suppressing it.  It will just blow up later.  You must use the space to debunk it, otherwise it will just come back.

(5.47) Whenever I wish to move my body
Or to utter any words,
I should first examine my mind
And then steadfastly act in an appropriate way.

All our actions need to be considered, rather than be habitual.  We’re learning to be in control at all times of our mental, physical, and verbal behavior. To always have a good heart and follow our wisdom.  We have unusual habits that we’ve been carrying for years and years — responding in ways that have never actually been considered. We need to become conscious of these habits.  We need to pay attention to not just of what we’re saying, but how we’re saying it; not just what we’re doing but how we’re doing it.  Huge problems can arise just from how someone says or does something, even if what they are doing is good.

It is true that as Buddhists we say the most important component in the creation of karma is our mental intention.  But our goal as Bodhisattva’s is to lead all beings to freedom, and we do that primarily through our verbal and physical actions.  Our verbal and physical actions are the medium through which our mental intentions take form in the world.  If our mind is correct but our verbal and mental actions wrong, our karma may be good but our benefit in the world will be limited.  For this reason, just as we need to bring our mental actions under control, we also need to bring our bodily and verbal actions under control.

As with the mind, it begins with becoming aware of what we are physically and verbally doing.  Most people are completely unaware how they come across to others.  Internally they don’t mean to, but externally they can come across as haughty, aggressive, careless, rude, ungrateful, clumsy, or just plain dumb.  Of course we should not be attached to what others think of us, meaning we shouldn’t think our own happiness depends on others thinking certain things of us.  But this doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be concerned about what others think of us as part of our bodhichitta wish to help them.  In the mind of the spiritual person, they are just trying to be a good person, but to others they can come across as uptight, self-righteous judgmental moralizers.  Our pride often blinds us to seeing our own faults, but usually makes us keenly aware of the faults of others.  If we are to change our behavior, we must first become aware of it.

Once we become aware of it, we should seek to identify what we are doing wrong and how we can do better, then we should apply effort to do so.  It is important, though, that we don’t become awkward about it.  If we come across like some motionless, heartless robot or we become so paranoid about doing anything wrong we become paralyzed or overly apologetic for every slight mistake, then people will just think we’re weird!  We need to be natural yet controlled, relaxed yet clear of purpose, easy-going yet meaningful, approachable yet different than others, supple yet strong, confident yet humble, kind yet firm, the list goes on and on.  We are to embody every good quality simultaneously, especially those that seem contradictory.  Such is the path of the middle way.

To keep it simple, though, we shouldn’t do anything with our body or speech unless we have a clear and meaningful purpose for doing so.  If we just remember this, while remaining natural and easy-going, we will gradually find our way to correct action.  Ultimately, our real objective is to bring the guru into our heart, generate a compassionate motivation for those around us, and request that our every action of body, speech and mind is the guru working through us to liberate all beings.  If we can learn such reliance, all of our actions will naturally fall into place.

(5.46) If for no reason I begin to perform actions
That cause damage to the environment,
I should recall Buddha’s advice
And, out of respect, stop straightaway.

Shantideva’s advice here is to be friendly to the environment.  Not caring about our environment, being un-thoughtful, reflects a more general attitude which is not in accordance with a Bodhisattva’s moral discipline.  Many of the acts we do to be more environmentally friendly, such as recycling, arguably have a negligible impact compared to the scale of the environmental crisis we face.  But the point is not the physical action, rather it is the mental intention of wanting to protect the whole world.  This mental intention is hugely beneficial because it is motivated by a concern for everyone.  Besides, every little bit helps, so even if a small action, it is better than nothing.

Being considerate of others means being mindful of the impact our actions have on the lives of others, and then taking steps to minimize such harm.  For example, it is the industry and consumerism of the rich world that is causing climate change, but it is the poor of the world who will suffer most from sea-level rise, drought and desertification.  More than a billion people in China are choking on the pollution from the factories filling our stores with goods.  Do we think about them?  Do we think about the species dying out, the fish poisoned by our chemicals, or future generations who will be left with a planet stripped bare?

Sometimes we think there is nothing we can do, we are such a small part of a larger machine destroying the planet.  This may be true, but it is no excuse for not doing what we can do, in our own small way.  Even if no one act solves the problem, every little bit helps.  There are things we can do, the question is are we doing them?  If not, why not?  Is it because of some valid reason, or is it we just can’t be bothered, or worse we just don’t care?

There is a branch of Christianity called “creation spirituality.”  They view the world as it unfolds as the on-going creation of God, and to harm any part of the world is to harm God himself.  They cherish and treasure all of creation, and seek to love creation as their way of loving the creator.  Substitute creation for emanation and creator for Buddha and we have our tantric practice.  There is a branch of feminism called “eco-feminism.”  They view the environment as the body of Mother Nature, and encourage people to always remember with gratitude her kindness.  Sounds awfully similar to a Lamrim meditation.

As Buddhists, we understand that contaminated environments are created by contaminated karma.  If we want to clean up the environment, we need to clean up our own karma and help others clean up theirs.  Samsara is nothing other than the appearing object of ripened contaminated karma.  We do not merely seek to stop littering and polluting, rather we seek to completely eliminate the karmic causes of all contaminated environments by purifying our own and others minds of all contaminated karma.

We all love the teaching, “a pure mind experiences a pure world and an impure mind experiences an impure world.”   Normally we think of the verb “to appear” as an intransitive verb, meaning the subject of the sentence has no role in bringing about the object.  We say, “a Buddha appears.”  Geshe-la, however, likes to use the verb to appear as a transitive verb, meaning the subject brings about the object.  He says, “we appear Buddhas.”  In the same way, as Tantric bodhisattvas, we are not content to intransitively have a clean environment appear, rather we transitively seek to appear a pure environment.  Buddhists, especially Tantric practitioners, are fundamentally profound environmentalists.  We are spiritual environmentalists.

(5.45) Whenever I listen to any sort of talk,
Whether pleasant or unpleasant,
Or observe attractive or unattractive people,
I should prevent attachment or hatred towards them.

We need to learn to be more restrained.  When we generate attachment towards some things, we feel as if our mind is being “pulled in” by the object, and normally we go willingly thinking happiness is to be found there.  When we generate aversion towards other things, we feel the need to “push” the object away, and if we can’t push it away, we flee willingly thinking suffering is to be found there.  Just walking through a room full of people leaves us feeling pulled in or the need to push other things away in a wide variety of directions.  It’s exhausting.  We must try to weaken this habit so that we can achieve a much more balanced or stable mind.

Geshe Chekhawa says we need “Train without bias towards the objects.” This is important advice for us because we spend a lot of time with others.  First, we must become aware how our mind is being pulled in or pushed away.  If we don’t see it, we can’t do anything about it.  Second, we need to realize that this constant pulling and pushing causes our mind to be unbalanced, anxious and never at peace.  True freedom is the ability to go anywhere with anybody doing anything and our mind remains equally at peace.  We need nothing, we fear nothing.  That’s true freedom.  We need to take the time to fantasize how wonderful it would be if we had such freedom.  Just imagine how free we would feel to go through life not needing nor fearing anything.

With a desire to enjoy such freedom, we then need to change our habitual reactions to objects.  When we detect our mind being “pulled in” by our attachment to some objects, we should realize we are like a puppet on the strings of our attachment and then generate the wish to be truly free.  We remind ourselves that no happiness can be found in these objects, just further insatiable desire.  Our life experience has taught us that even if we obtain what we want, it never quite gives us the satisfaction we seek.  We are always left wanting more or we feel disappointed because it didn’t turn out the way we wanted.  Instead, we should recall that happiness comes from within our mind, and no external object has any power to do anything for us.  In this way we cut the strings that pull us and internally we remain balanced.

When we feel our mind wishing to push something away out of aversion, we should realize nothing has the power to disturb our mind if we don’t let it.  Things are only a “problem” for our worldly concerns, but adversity is our most powerful fuel on the path.  The mind of patient acceptance is a wisdom mind that knows how to use anything and everything for our spiritual training, so it feels no need to “push” anything away, rather it can welcome everything as an opportunity to train.  This does not mean we unnecessarily allow ourselves to be harmed nor does it mean we cooperate with others’ delusions and dysfunction, but it does mean when these thing happen it is not a “problem” for us, but rather an opportunity to train.

We need to be able to listen to what others say without bias.  Certainly, we should try to not react out of attachment if they praise us or hatred if they criticize us.  At present our mind is primarily driven by attachment and hatred.  We mustn’t look at others, especially those closest to us, with attachment or hatred.  We know if somebody appears attractive or unattractive our mind moves and we become unbalanced, like a “weeble wobble” (google it).  We need an evenness of mind, an equanimity.  We are equally welcoming and open with everybody.

It is important to be seen to possess that evenness, equanimity.  Because people know when we have it.  Especially within the Sangha we need to be more and more careful that we don’t become a bunch of cliques, the “in crowd” dedicated to the center and everyone else who just comes to “consume” without giving anything back.  Or between those who see everything the NKT does as faultless and those who don’t.  Or between Those who worship the teachers as a Buddha and those who see them as full of faults.  Or between those who mix traditions and those who don’t.  Or between those who have been around a long time and those who are new.  The list goes on and on, the “uptight Germans” vs. the “free-spirited Brazilians,” etc., etc., etc.  So many divisions we introduce into the Sangha, each with its own shade of judgmental attitude.  Shantideva says, no matter who we see, we need to simply be happy to see them, to listen.  This is a loving mind.

(5.43) I should undertake what I intend and have decided to do,
Without being distracted by other things;
And, with my thoughts focused on that practice,
For now, I should do just that.

(5.44) In this way, I shall do everything well;
Otherwise, I shall accomplish neither one thing nor the other.
With this skilful practice, there can be no increase
In secondary delusions, such as non-alertness.

In the modern world, people look up to those who can “multi-task.”  The people who can do many different things simultaneously.  Modern people wrongly think this makes us more productive.  The reality is quite different.  The ability to multi-task is not a quality, rather it is a modern disease.

First, it is actually impossible for the mind to do two things at once.  A single mind can only have a single object.  At best, multi-taskers are switching their focus from one object to another and back again as they do their work.  Second, switching our focus back and forth results in “transition costs” as our mind has to re-figure out where we left off last time we were working on a particular project, whereas staying focused on a project through to completion avoids that cost.  Third, most things of worth required sustained focus over an extended period of time to bring about the substantial change we are after.  As Geshe-la says, water can never boil if we keep turning the heat on and off.  Fourth, and most importantly, if we never learn to focus like a laser on our daily activities, what hope do we have of doing so during our meditation practices.  If in life we train our mind to flit from one object to another, it is certain we will do the same while in meditation.

Meditation is, by definition, the familiarizing of our mind with virtue.  The fundamental function of concentration is we become whatever we focus on.  If we focus on sex and violence, we will become a lustful and violent person.  If we focus on wisdom and compassion, we will become a wise and compassionate person.  The more fully we absorb our mind in our object, the more complete will be this inner transformation.  If we never are able to focus our mind because it is constantly jumping from one thing to another, we will never absorb our mind into its object and no spiritual transformation can take place.

According to Tantra, all of our contaminated karma is stored on our very subtle mind.  If we succeed in making manifest our very subtle mind and then we meditate on its emptiness, we will directly and simultaneously uproot all of our contaminated karma accumulated since beginningless time.  Realizing the emptiness of our very subtle mind is the very purpose of our tantric practice, and through this realization we can remove all delusions and their imprints and thereby become a Buddha in a matter of years, or even months.  The method for making manifest our very subtle mind is to cause all of our inner winds to gather, dissolve and absorb into our indestructible drop at our heart.  Once all of our winds are gathered in this way, our very subtle mind of clear light will naturally become manifest.  The most important thing to know about inner winds is the mind is located at the object of cognition and it is carried to its object on our inner winds.  If our mind conceives the moon, our mind quite literally is at the moon, and our inner winds went there with it.  If our mind wanders to any object other than our indestructible drop at our heart, our winds will go there, and our very subtle mind will never be made manifest.  It is impossible to realize the emptiness of an object we do not first cognize conventionally.  Therefore, without learning to focus our mind, enlightenment quite literally is impossible.

With this skilful practice of doing everything with single-pointed focus, there can be no increase in secondary delusions, such as non-alertness.  When we are doing our jobs and fulfilling our responsibilities, we should try to just concentrate on one thing.  It is especially important that we do this when it comes to our formal practices.  How many of us can get through a whole sadhana without thinking of other things?  Sometimes we use our puja time to think about other things because it is the only time we have to do it.

But the reality is the more we focus on our puja, the more we will be tapping into the Spiritual Guide’s mind and he will bless us with the best ideas when we need them.  If we rely wholeheartedly upon our Spiritual Guide, he’ll bless us to take into consideration what is neccessary at any time, and then we don’t have to worry.  There is a scene in the first Star Wars where the Jedi is in a fierce light-saber battle with Darth Maul, and then a barrier separates the two.  The Jedi then kneels down, closes his eyes and waits and springs into action when ‘the force’ tells him to.  We need to be just like that.  But we still worry a lot, thinking there are things we need to think about.  But why?   The deeper one’s reliance, the less one worries because we feel ourselves guided in all our activities by the Spiritual Guide.

In everything we do we should focus on what we are doing.  And what are we doing?  We are focusing on allowing the Spiritual Guide to work through us without getting in the way.  If we do this, the Spiritual Guide will literally enter into us and we will become an extension of him.  It will be as if he is in us and he is really here.  He can accomplish all that he can accomplish through us.  We become an instrument and he does everything.

Ironically, if we can learn to do one thing, namely focus on faithful reliance in everything we do, we can effortlessly accomplish all other activities.  If we become whatever we focus our mind on, and what we focus our mind on is the Spiritual Guide as the synthesis of all the Buddhas, we will quite literally become one with (or an extension of) all the Buddhas.  Such is the power of a focused mind.

(5.41) Striving for concentration by whatever means,
I should not let my mind wander for even a moment
But closely examine it by asking,
“How is my mind behaving?”

We have two extremes of mind – the busy mind and spacey mind.  Most of the time, our mind can be very busy, active, racing even.  And perhaps it seems with that mind we are able to accomplish a lot externally.  Some of the time, we can have a mind that is relatively peaceful, some space, but we then slide into a laziness, accomplishing very little or perhaps nothing at all.  We need to find the middle way.  We need a sharpness of mind, keenly aware of what’s happening, what needs to be done. Yet at the same time there must be peace, stillness, space, clarity.  We can accomplish a great deal, yet maintain perfect calm and a peaceful mind.  To a great extent we can achieve this state of mind with a focused, disciplined, concentrated mind.

It is especially important to closely examine our mind, asking how is it behaving.   This is an essential part of training the mind.  We’re not used to taking time out for such a proper examination.  But if we do, we will find it very, very easy to practice the moral discipline of restraint.  So much of our behavior is committed through the force of unconscious habit.  Thoughts and feeling arise, then we act on them without much involvement on our part.  This is what needs to change.

Gen-la Losang says what is natural is simply what is familiar.  Our habitual reactions to events in our life arise from karmic tendencies similar to the cause of having reacted in this way in the past (both in this life and in our previous lives).  The problem is this:  our habitual way of reacting is a deluded one, and delusions always make things worse.  No matter how many times we think, “this time will be different,” it never is.  Our life will turn around only when we change our habitual deluded reactions into virtuous and wisdom reactions.  In the beginning, this will feel forced and require great effort.  But if we stick with it, eventually wisdom and virtue will become our habitual reactions and it will become much easier.

(42) It is said there are times, when practising giving, that one can be judicious
In applying some of the finer points of moral discipline.
When there is danger or a special celebration,
One can perform actions suitable for that occasion.

This advice given so that we don’t become too rigid and go to the other extreme with our behavior.  In Meaningful to Behold Geshe-la says our basic consideration should be what is more beneficial for others.  We should do whatever is most important at the particular moment, using our intelligence as much as we can.  Gen-la Losang tells the story of when he was in Spain, one of the benefactors for the center threw a party to celebrate some good development.  As was culturally customary, he brought out Champagne.  As a monk with pratimoksha vows to avoid taking intoxicants, Gen-la Losang at first refused.  The benefactor then felt embarrassed, like he had done something wrong and then told everybody to put it away.  Realizing he had created an awkward moment for everyone, Gen-la then said it was no problem, took the glass and sipped politely to the toast.  The point is we need to act naturally and appropriately in every situation and not sacrifice a great virtue (such as appreciating the kindness of the benefactor and the good intention behind the toast) on the altar of a smaller virtue of not taking a sip of alcohol.  The same sort of reasoning can be applied to a wide variety of circumstances we find ourselves in.

While it is true we should try not to be too rigid, we should also not use this as an excuse to go to the other extreme and abandon our moral discipline entirely.  For example, just because we’re invited to a special celebration with our old friends does not mean we shouldn’t still try to regard ourself as a spiritual person.  We can ask ourselves how somebody we respect would behave in this situation.

Sometimes we lie to ourselves with a Dharma justification “I am doing this to establish or improve my relationships with others” when in reality this is not our motivation.  It is not enough to have a Dharma rationalization, it has to actually be our reason informing our behavior.  We have to lift people out of the ordinary to the spiritual, but we can’t be so otherworldly that we’re unapproachable.  If we are, it’s difficult for people to feel comfortable.  We should not make a scene about how our behavior is different, especially if it will make other people uncomfortable or feel judged for their own behavior.  Likewise, if we come across like some uptight, doesn’t know how to have a good time person, we might feel self-righteous, but we will hardly encourage anybody to enter the spiritual path.  The reality is life is more enjoyable when we experience it without delusion and negativity.  When people see it is possible to have a great (even better) time without delusion and negativity, then people will naturally want what we’re smoking!

(5.39) I should prepare for any activity by thinking,
“My body and mind must remain correctly composed”;
And from time to time check carefully to see
What I am actually doing and thinking.

This is helpful advice for us and others.  We all have quite a lot of extra bodily movement that is and looks uncontrolled.  We are normally completely unaware of movement of our arms, hands, head, mouth, eyes.  They just do their thing as we go about our day.  All of these are a reflection of quite extreme movements of mind.  Our mind is running around.

We notice the difference when we are with someone who is gathered and has a mental and physical stillness about them.  It helps us slow down and calm down.  Gen Samten is the master of this.  When you are around him, you can just feel his stillness, both mental and physical.  But it doesn’t feel rigid and unmoving, rather it feels gathered, stable and composed with a dash of suppleness and flexibility.  When he is listening to somebody, for example, you can just tell all of him is listening.  Because he has the power to give his undivided attention, he is able to bring real benefit to others.

Internally, we always need to remain still and calm.  Externally, we need to be gathered without uncontrolled movements, but natural and approachable.  But we need to not go to the other extreme of being unnatural.  This will make people feel uncomfortable and make it difficult for them to relate to us.

Our own actions of body, speech, and mind must be deliberate, controlled, and arising from a clear intention in our mind.  Our actions must have meaning and purpose.  We must try not to lose that.  If we succeed, then we will discover over time that the difference between our meditation session and our meditation break gets smaller and smaller.  We become quite composed.  If we can develop that stillness, we can reduce that gap.  We need to check and look to see what we are doing and how we are acting.  we have to be aware of every moment of our behavior.

(5.40) With all my effort, I should regularly check
That the unsubdued elephant of my mind
Has not broken free but remains bound
To the great pillar of thinking about Dharma.

We think about an awful lot. We have this crazy, untamed mind going everywhere.  Most of our conscious thoughts are quite unnecessary, leaving us with no space at all. Our mind is cluttered, full of conceptual thoughts.  As a result, our mind is particularly unpeaceful.   When our mind is full of conceptuality, it is a breeding ground for delusion and non-virtue.  We plan a lot, and we worry every day, thinking about all sorts of different things.  We wonder – we think about this happening and that happening.  We waste a tremendous amount of mental energy worrying about “what if”.  It seems to never end.  We go through infinite possibilities and we cannot rest.

Why don’t we simply maintain refuge, rely upon our spiritual guide, simply, merely trust?  “But, but, but, …” our mind objects.  No buts.  We over-analyse.  Nothing wrong with analysis, but there is a lot wrong with over analysis.  When we want to get to know someone, we think about their behavior, habits, their history, etc.  Why can’t we just think, “my kind mother,” “deity,” “hero,” “heroine.”  By keeping it simple and letting go of all these distractions, we allow space in our mind, keeping it mind bound to that great pillar of thinking about Dharma.

When Geshe-la opened the temple at Manjushri and he gave three days of teachings on overcoming distractions, he said something quite extraordinary.  He said, “if our mind is always thinking about Dharma, we are never distracted.”  Our mind may wander from one Dharma subject to another, something we should eventually gain control over, but in the meantime as long as our mind is engaged with some truth of Dharma, we are not falling victim to distraction.  When we think deeply about this, nothing could be more important than making this our new habit.